Cancer still SUCKS

As 2019 ends I have some words for you cancer:

Dear Cancer,

I still hate you. I will never let you steal my spirit. You cannot have me.

In late 2010, I fought like hell to get a proper diagnosis and when 2011 began I was dying. You came to me in the form of melanoma. Or as some people call, "just skin cancer." You came back after 10 years and tried to kill me. It did not work so F-YOU!!

Many people say to me,"how long has it been?" and seem confused that I am still concerned about it... but the battle I had with you cancer will always be a part of me. I will continue to share my story to spread HOPE to others. I pray and hope my efforts bring comfort to others who are fighting cancer.

While you came to me as melanoma, many others get breast cancer, lymphoma, ovarian, or lung cancer... you have so many ways to manifest yourself and we will continue to fight. We will continue to step up and face the horribly painful and toxic chemicals necessary to stay alive.

Cancer patients carry the scar of fighting forever....some scars are literally on our skin and others stay in our minds... memories of an IV drip that felt like glass shards going into our blood stream or a medicine nicknamed "shake and bake" for the uncontrollable shaking that would begin after the toxic medicine entered our bloodstream. The memory of being a cancer patient is one that is hard to shake off... losing your hair, throwing up EVERYTHING and losing massive amounts of weight... all of these experiences leave an imprint on a person.

Yet, HERE WE ARE, STANDING TALL!! 

I stand tall against you cancer, for those who fought like hell and left their damaged bodies to go to heaven. There are somethings that are simply too  damaging for a fragile human body. Cancer treatment can be SO hard and it truly HURTS. These people are not weak... or did not fight enough... we will never know why some of us are alive while others passed away. This thought is always present in my mind.

I will continue to use MY LIFE for good and do what I can to spread HOPE in the face of the darkness that is CANCER. 


The only "good thing" I have left over from my fight with you cancer is I found out how strong I am. I am stronger than I ever thought.  SO, SCREW YOU CANCER!!