Cancer and Christmas

One of the support groups I belong to for cancer recently had a member mention all the tests she will be going through now.

Cancer does not know or care about the holidays...

in 2010 I was suffering from a large tumor that grew to be 16 cm large and it was wrapped around my brachial plexus nerve in my left armpit. The pain was immense. Through knowing someone who knew someone who knew Dr. Morton at the John Wayne Cancer Center in Santa Monica, CA, I had an appointment granted for December 23rd, 2010. I had a CT/Pet scan.... blood work, and a brain MRI... all with the tumor growing bigger and subcutaneous tumors popping up on my abdomen. I was in huge amounts of pain. Surgery was scheduled for the first week of January to remove the tumor. (Which by the way had 2 JP drains attached to it from a surgeon who had tried to take it out in November.)

The phone rang at dinner time. The surgery was cancelled. The cancer had spread to my lungs.


In 2010 the many new treatments were not yet FDA approved. There was truly no options, or so I thought, to save my life. Christmas of 2010 was to be my last holiday with my family. My heart broke.


Angel blessings led me to the Angeles Clinic in LA where many wonderfully smart people were developing new treatments for melanoma. I met with Dr. Omid Hamid and he said he would try to save my life. I was dying and probably without him had around 2-4 months to live.


SO, here I am! 8 years later!!  I went through 3 years of chemotherapy and 2 years of immunotherapy in 5 months. It is called biochemotherapy. 5 drugs administered all together. An arsenal of toxic poison to kill the cancer. It almost killed me as I lay in a bed on the oncology ward of St. John's Hospital in Santa Monica. I endured 5 cycles and lost 60 pounds  and all my hair. I had a major surgery to remove the dead tumor in late April of 2011. The treatment sent my body into menopause and the surgery left me with limited use of my left arm. The cost of life for me.


I know the horror of facing cancer during the holidays. It is horrible beyond words. If you know someone fighting cancer please, 1) do not ignore them... call or send a card! It means the world to them!  2) as hard as it is... look at their face. watching yourself die while trying to fight cancer is extremely frightening and it is hard to see that in another human. People I knew would turn away from me,  in my home town, once I returned home. It hurt.

People have beat cancer and beat serious as hell diagnosis's!  And people who have passed away have not died due to a lack of fighting. We all fight with every ounce of energy... fighting cancer is a full time job and the disease that is cancer is a sneaky bastard... often lurking in the tiniest of cells only to come back. melanoma patients know that all too well... I personally have had it twice... each time 10 years apart!! 

Hug each other. Celebrate one another. Nothing is guaranteed.

I write this to spread hope to those suffering from cancer.... screw you cancer!!!