I endured 5 rounds of biochemotherapy. It is a 22 day cycle of 3 chemotherapy drugs and 2 immunotherapy drugs. This treatment almost killed me and I remember during the 3rd cycle I was dying. I thought that the last thing I would see was the skyline of Los Angeles from St. John's 4th floor oncology ward. Doctors and nurses checked my vitals every 4 hours. Some people die days into this treatment.... and I completed 5 rounds.
After receiving about 3 years of treatments in 5 months I was skin and bones. I returned to a job that did not even want me.... I went back to work and cried and cried. My bones hurt like hell. I had gone through menopause at 40 as a result of the treatment. Yet.... I persevered. Everyday I got up and did what I could to keep moving forward.
In the 8 years since my treatment my body finally feels healed. I gained back all the weight I lost during chemo and lost it again... in a healthy non sick way! I hike a lot and work full time. But the truth of it is, I am an older person on the inside. I get tired fast. I run out of energy. Life AC (After Cancer) is wonderful, but for me, I am different.
I share all of this because I know there are those out there fighting not just melanoma, but all types of cancer. The battle with cancer is never easy. A post cancer life is full of pain and anxiety as you wonder what happened to all my energy? Many of us get back to a "normal" but it is a new normal. If you are reading this and fighting cancer, take it easy on yourself and know that others of us have been where you are and have returned to life. Take Care of you! Do what you want... and remember, you are a rock star for the fight you are fighting and / or the fight you did to become cancer free!!
here are some pictures of my daughter on a bucket list trip to Costa Rica this last June!
